Stress Reduction
Conflict Resolution
Professional Speaking
Tapes and Workbooks

Contact Us

Je parle Francais

Io parlo Italiano

Member of the National Speakers Association

Dr. Gordon conducts workshops and training about negotiation.  He is available for consultation on how to negotiate, as well as being available to negotiate on your behalf.

Negotiation is the most important part of our lives. We always need to negotiate sales, relationships, and even our consultation fees. 

By using the services of Dr. Gordon, you will learn:

  • How to achieve what you want in the negotiation.
  • How to increase your profit margin. 
  • How to create a better relationship with the people with whom you negotiate, like employees, partners, competitors, vendors, and service providers.
  • How to change mind sets to create breakthroughs
Preparations for Negotiation 
  • Before you start negotiating, you have to get into a positive state of mind and to start your negotiation with the belief that you will achieve what you want.
  • It is important to accept the situation that you are in, because only from acceptance can you get to the next step of creating what you want to achieve in the negotiation.
  • It is very important to listen to the other party with whom you are negotiating.  (Remember, you have two ears and one mouth.) 
  • Do not try to guess what the other party wants.
  • Always accept and acknowledge the feelings of the other party.
  • When you negotiate, you have to remember that you are not the negotiation, but are simply yourself who is involved in the negotiation process.  If you avoid identifying personally with the negotiation process, you will be able to achieve what you want more effectively.
  • Whatever the outcome of the negotiation, do not take it personally, and this will prepare you to be more positive for the next negotiation.


When you negotiate, do not begin with the attitude that you need to win or assert your point of view. You have to understand that there are many different points of view.  If you start with the idea that you will have to give in, for example, monetarily, in order to come to a solution, you have already lost. You will always want to give as little as possible and the other party will always want the maximum, and no one will be satisfied.  Dont assume that the other partys primary concern is the same as yours.  You have to look at the whole picture and see if there are other things that your party to the conflict is interested in, and then you will come to an agreement by giving the other party what they need also. 

Be open to the fact that there are other things that might be important to the other side.  If you negotiate salaries and there is a conflict between the CEO and the employees, do not assume that the only important thing is the salary.  If this is what you emphasize, you will never be able to match salaries to everyones satisfaction.  You have to look at the whole picture of what the employees would be happy with, for example, flex schedules, more benefits, more freedom for self-expression, more responsibility and being able to make more of their own decisions, empowerment, etc.  So if you find out what is the most important thing from the point of view of the employees, then salary might become only secondary.  In monetary negotiations, sometimes the manner of delivery of product will be more important than the price. 

Strategies for Negotiations

    1. Always be ready to walk away from the situation.  As long as youre not ready to walk away from the situation, the other party is in a better position.
    2. Say, I have to check with the president (or vice-president, or the committee), but I think that you will have to make a better offer, otherwise they wont want to look at it. 
    3. If the other party says they have to check with a committee or somebody else, compliment them and say, Im sure that with your recommendation, the committee will agree to what we offer.
    4. When you come back from the committee, you can always say that the committee wants a better offer, and if the question will be how much better, answer, The maximum that you can give because we are too far apart.
    5. When you feel that the other party is putting too much pressure on you for the price or the terms of the negotiation, state that you feel that at this stage you have to take the information to your superior, board of directors, or committee, etc.  Come back later with an offer that is even farther away from what you negotiated before, saying that this is the best that the committee agreed to do.  The other party will probably demand to go back to the original terms that you negotiated before going to your superior.  A good statement would be, If I convince them to take what we talked about before, will you take this offer?  Usually this will stop the haggling.
    6. Keep all your concessions to the last minute even if they are not important to you, and use them as negotiating tools. 
    7. Always come with an offer that is not a final offer in order to make the other party feel good for achieving a better outcome, and always congratulate them and compliment them for the good work that they have done.  Be amazed at what good negotiators they are.
    8. Always trade off.  Even if you give something that you dont need, always ask something in return.
    9. When you negotiate, always use smaller denominations.  If you talk about the price of a square foot, divide the price to a monthly or daily cost, and not a yearly cost.  If you are on the other side of the negotiation, show your party how expensive it is for you to use the whole term of the contract.
    10. Do not ask for everything that you want up front.  When you come to an agreement, in the last minute when you are shaking hands, or the last day of negotiation and everything is already clear, throw in another small demand.  Another possibility is when you come to an agreement and you are ready to sign, come back and say that you could not convince your superior this was a good deal, and you have get a small concession from your partner to the negotiation in order to convince your superior to sign the agreement.
    11. Always play the reluctant buyer or seller.  Always have another possibility in mind, even if it is not a viable one.  However, having a viable possibility will always put you in the superior position of negotiating because when you have another possibility you seem less eager and you negotiate better.  Do not even think that you need this particular thing. 
    12. As a buyer, always start negotiating with the lowest price, and as a seller, start your negotiation by asking what is the highest price the other party will pay.
    13. As a buyer or seller, never offer to split the difference. Let the other party ask to split the difference.  You can ask to split the difference only when you add another demand.
    14. Apologize for your board of directors unwillingness to negotiate, and stress the amount of time that you both spent to get to this point.  Say at this point that it is worth it to come to some agreement

February 18, 2000

To Whom It May Concern:

This letter of recommendation is for Dr. Roby Gordon, P.F.P.; it is based on several office-lease negotiating experiences in which he represented an engineering company and I exclusively represented a mid-rise office building in Oakland, CA.

During his search for offices in the Oakland area, Dr. Gordon contacted me.  He was focused in his search and knew exactly knew what he wanted.  He has a creative negotiating approach. When the Oakland office became a success and outgrew the sublease arrangement, Dr. Gordon opened negotiations on a larger office suite and succeeded in acquiring some of the best office space in the building at a great price.  His attitude and creative approach to negotiation was eye opening.

I understand that Dr. Gordon also provides financial expertise and stress management.  Based on my experiences with him, I can unequivocally recommend him as a great resource.  I look forward to working with Dr. Gordon again in the future; I can attest to his strong character, business acumen and common-sense approach to the various types of negotiations which occur throughout life.


Peter L. Glenister
Golden Future Real Estate




2000 The Monetary Stress Institute. All Rights Reserved


 Created by and CLTS

For website related questions email Cezar